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Experiences, Travels

Heading home?

I have thought about the concept of home a lot, especially in the last years. It seems to me that we all need it in one form or another – if not necessarily the physical place, then definitely the feeling of being home.

I am heading to Sofia today, the city I was born and lived in for more than 20 years. Today, after more than 11 years of absence and almost 8 years* of not having visited it at all, I am feeling a little nervous about the re-encounter.

By TodorBozhinov; CC BY-SA 3.0 license; via Wikimedia Commons

By TodorBozhinov; CC BY-SA 3.0 license; via Wikimedia Commons


I left sad and disappointed after years of political, economic, and personal turmoil. Nevertheless, I was still very attached to what I felt was my beloved home and it never occurred to me that I could possibly be away from it for such a long time. The disappointment prevailed over the years and the annual visits became increasingly difficult. It took me many years to overcome the animosity I held against a place I once adored.

It’s with mixed feelings that I am sitting at the airport today – looking forward to re-discovering Sofia, on the one hand, and apprehensive to confront ‘old’ patterns and emotional memories, on the other. I will do my best to embrace the experience and will have the chance to share impressions in the next weeks.

*except a short 48-hour trip 5 years ago

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About irinapashina

Marketing professional, blogger, group fitness instructor, reader, theater-goer

Discussion

4 thoughts on “Heading home?

  1. Oh my God ! I understand you. Almost the same feelings about by home town in Russia. Difficult to call it home once you leave it and settle down in what I call a “world home”, travelling and changing apparts, people you know, experiences you get. Especially hard to come back when you have left it with a strange feeling of “escape”.
    Wish you nevertheless a great trip full of positive memories and emotions !

    Ekaterina

    Posted by Ekaterina | June 16, 2014, 10:54 am
    • Katrina, thanks for your comment. It feels good to know that you can relate to my thoughts so well. It’s a weird feeling to be back – everything is so different to me, but seems still exactly the same. Hard to explain, but I believe you might know what I mean. Thank you for the good wishes!

      Posted by irinapashina | June 16, 2014, 8:25 pm
  2. Wish you a pleasant trip enjoy ! Karola

    Posted by Karola | June 16, 2014, 4:29 pm

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